What a fabulous session. I feel they are getting better and better each week. We had all 13 girls attend today. Hooray. Had a slight faux pas my end where I forgot my box with all my equipment in it, but luckily I had some other activities with me and I'm pretty good with flowing with whatever happens and changing the plan last minute.
Today I tried something a bit different that I had learnt from a dear friend in a workshop a few years ago. it was how to hold your power, how to have no fear and how to say no!
We started the session with a singing meditation that opens up the heart. We discussed how fear is the opposite of love, so if we can stay in our hearts, it can give us courage (courage actually comes from the French - of the heart, coeur is heart). I told them a story of a friend who faced some men who had done a bad thing to her as teenager. She faced them with courage and looked them in the eye with no fear. They no longer have any power over her as she has taken her power back after 35 years.
This led to a discussion about swearing; about how people use swear words in everyday language to seem tough and cool but actually we are more clever than that and have more vocabulary we can use. Swearing can be powerful and should only be used in extreme cases. I explained how if my boundaries are crossed and ignored and I feel I am in some sort of danger then I use my power to say no. I showed them and they were shocked, I didn't even have to shout, just raised my voice and stood firm demonstrating courage. Hopefully the girls won't have to use their no like that anytime soon but it is good to see and feel the power of someone meaning it - enough is enough.
We learnt about our bodies today and how our bodies can help us make decisions and know what to do. You can try this at home - if you have a yes or no question and you are being indecisive, close your eyes, ask the question and if your body tips forward, it's a yes and if it goes back then it's a no. This is often our true answer, we always know what to do really.
We had a great laugh playing 'Pukana' and practising being confident by getting louder and louder whilst keeping eye contact. Some didn't want to join in this time, but others really got into it. I loved how one of the girls who was shy last week suddenly took on a leadership role. I was also impressed with all the questions she asked. having the confidence to ask hard hitting questions is fantastic, and then me having to decide if it is something I'd like to answer or not. Some of the other girls giggled nervously like she shouldn't be asking me questions, however I am showing the girls that I am open so they can eventually feel safe enough to open up and share too.
We then completed a strengths sheet so the girls can truly know themselves and be able to say positive things about themselves. It is amazing how many girls find it challenging to say positive things about themselves, for example instead of saying - 'I am a good cook', they add 'I guess' to the end. Why is it that we find it so hard to celebrate ourselves? Sure arrogance is ugly but surely we should be able to say what we are good at without grimacing?
We finished our session with a story about a young Afro-American girl in America who became an advocate for racial equality, reminding the girls to stick up for what they believe in and that you are never too young to make a difference in your community.
So, I may have left all my equipment at home, however that was a better session than I could ever have planned on paper!
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